I apologize for the lack of posts lately and want to thank those readers that kept coming back in search of something new. I love you.
It has been a pretty crappy September so far. I’m not complaining for the sake of complaining (even though I’m known for doing that). I’m taking this somewhere.
All because someone thought the world didn’t need him. A friend near and dear to my husband, the man who brought us together, took his own life this month. He thought that there was no future, no support network waiting for him. The weight of the modern world with its demand for degrees and stacking bills added with the demands of the heart felt like too much for him.
At least, that’s what we are left to think. We don’t really know the answer, the reason, and we never will. That was taken away from us. His smile and goofy catch phrases were taken from us. In its place is a dark cloud that hovers over even the best occasions.
Ironically and very sadly, it’s suicide prevention month. I know, I know. The month is almost over. I’ve been busy, but I haven’t forgotten. I want to find the highest point and scream to everyone within earshot that this world needs your voice. Maybe not the world as a whole, but someone near and dear to you is always waiting to hear your voice again, see your smile. Maybe you were meant to bring change to the world or maybe you were just meant to bring change to one person.
After hearing this god awful news, my hubby brought it upon himself to reach out to kids in the community that he grew up in. Some places wouldn’t let him speak, but a couple did. He stood in front of seats that he had once been in, that his friend had once been in and told everyone that there was no reason for what happened. He told them that everyone had at least someone in their life that loved them deeply and dearly. He told them that there was always someone willing to be there and help them out, to see them succeed.
The rest of that week was filled with drinks raised in our friend’s name, his favorite video games, and stories happily told with tears still in our eyes. We all wished that he could have been there, waking up with the hopes that it all had been a nightmare.
Never forget that you were meant for something or else you wouldn’t be here at all. You were meant to LIVE and, goddamnit, someone is going to miss the hell out of you if you aren’t here. Don’t feel ashamed, I have to remind myself of this a lot, too.